Sorrow
I don't know sometimes... I get so down about random things. Then my mind spirals off into the thought that I could die any day here or later. It kills me more thinking on it. I feel myself die a little each time with it. I think about those I care about and the one I love. I think...

"Is it worth it to be with me? I don't want you sad..." I want to make myself hurt and forget this thought. But it's wrong to do that. I do it when I'm so down like this. Even my friends who came over can't seem to...help. I'm a failure at a human life. Ill. Dying...

I was told to never think this way. But it happens... It hurts when I do. I cry and I can't stop. My chest hurts so much. It's so tense and it's like squeezing. I love him so much. I love him and my heart aches for him. But it also slows and keeps that same old beat. Alex...Alex... Alex is nothing more than a waste. But his heart and soul belongs to the one he loves.

Save me...